Most adult friend-making events are fine to attend alone, but they are not equally good for making friends. The ones that work best have a shared activity, a small group and a schedule that repeats, because friendships come from seeing the same people several times, not from one big night.
Two questions to ask about any event
- Can I arrive alone without it being strange? Look for wording such as "individuals welcome", read the event description and look at photos: are people in pairs, or mingling?
- Will I see the same people again? A weekly or monthly group beats a one-off, however fun the one-off looks.
Events that pass both tests are where friendships tend to form. For the broader picture of where adults meet others, see where to meet friends as an adult.
Event types compared
This table is a judgement guide based on how each format is usually organised, not a guarantee about any specific event.
| Format | Solo-friendliness | Repeat-ability | How many visits before judging | Watch out for |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Interest group (book club, board games, hiking club) | High: everyone shares a topic | High: regular schedule | 3 to 4 | Cliques that formed years ago |
| Class or workshop (pottery, cooking, dance) | High: the activity gives you something to do | Medium: courses end | The whole course | Short courses end before friendships form |
| Volunteering shifts | High: tasks, no small talk required | High if you commit to one cause | 3 | Overstretching yourself |
| Social sports or running club | High, if beginner-friendly | High | 3 to 4 | Competitive groups |
| Language exchange or conversation night | High: conversation is the point | High | 2 to 3 | Pure one-to-one swaps with no group |
| Organised "friend dating" socials | Medium to high: attendees often come to meet people | Medium | 2 | Large crowds and speed-style formats |
| Large networking mixer | Medium: many come alone but with a work goal | Low | 1 to 2 | Surface-level chat only |
| Party, wedding or friend-of-a-friend event | Low to medium: groups already formed | Low | n/a | Hard to get into conversations |
| Festivals and big one-off events | Medium: lots of solo attendees | Very low | n/a | No follow-up unless you swap contacts |
How to choose from the table
- If you are shy: choose an activity-based format (class, club, volunteering). You talk about the task, not about yourself. See make friends as an introvert.
- If you have little time: choose one weekly event rather than three occasional ones.
- If you are new in town: a mix of one interest group and one language or newcomer night works well. See make friends in a new city.
- If you hate small talk: pick formats where a game, a task or a script carries the conversation.
How to read an event page before you go
Spend two minutes on the event listing:
- Is it a recurring series? Look for a name, a regular slot or past events.
- How many people? Smaller groups are easier to enter. If the page does not state numbers, treat it as unknown.
- Is there structure? Introductions, a game, a task: all lower the barrier.
- Is there a host or organiser? Hosts introduce newcomers. Look for "message the organiser" or "first-timers" details on the official page.
- What are the rules? Age limits, fees, sign-up requirements and cancellation terms vary. Do not rely on a summary like this one; check the official listing.
If you use Meetup, other event platforms or community notice boards, compare options in Meetup alternatives.
The first-visit playbook
- Arrive a little early. Early arrivals are usually few and talk more openly.
- Have one opening line. "Is this your first time here?" works almost everywhere. More ideas are in the conversation starter generator.
- Set a tiny goal. For example: have one conversation of more than two minutes. Not "make a friend".
- Ask one person for a follow-up. "I'm coming next week too, will you be there?" is easy to say and easy to answer.
- Leave when you meant to. A planned exit lowers the pressure to start.
A short script for the follow-up, after a good chat: "I enjoyed talking. I'm planning to come next time. Should we say hi then?" This leaves room to say no without awkwardness, and many people say yes.
How many visits before you decide
Judge too early and you quit the group that would have worked. Judge too late and you waste months. A workable rule:
| Visit | What to expect | What to do |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | Everyone is a stranger, you feel on the outside | Do not judge. Note one person you could greet again |
| 2 | A few faces repeat, a name or two stick | Use names. Offer one detail about yourself |
| 3 | You know the rhythm | Ask someone for a coffee afterward or suggest a small extra plan |
| 4 | You can tell whether you click with this group | Decide: keep, reduce or drop |
If, after four tries, nobody has spoken to you and you have tried to speak to others, move on without blaming yourself. The format may not suit you. Friend groups and clubs lists other kinds to try, and how to make friends as an adult covers the longer path from acquaintance to friend.
Safety and comfort
Meeting strangers calls for ordinary care: pick public venues, tell someone where you are going and leave if something feels off. If an event is not what its listing described, you can walk out. These tips are general; they are not a substitute for the venue's own safety information.
Where Solo Era fits
Solo Era is an iPhone app for practising doing things alone, with weekly missions, five difficulty levels, a before-and-after rating of how nervous you felt, and a photo journal. It is not a friend-finding or matching app, and it does not introduce you to people. What it can help with is the part before the event: the walk in, the first minute at the door. The people category includes the level 2 mission "Introduce yourself to an event organiser." and, at level 3, "Go to a local astronomy club's indoor talk." Free to download; a subscription is required to start missions. Prices and any free trial are shown in the app and depend on the offer and eligibility. The app is not therapy.
Solo Era for iPhone
Practise the walk-in
Try a people mission before your first event and rate your nervousness before and after, so you can see how it changes.
To find events in your area, apps for finding things to do alone compares the main options.
FAQ
Is it okay to go to a friend-making event alone?
Yes. At events designed for meeting people, many attendees arrive on their own. The organiser's page often says so; check it.
What is the best type of event for making friends?
Repeating, small, activity-based events, such as interest groups, classes with a long run, or regular volunteering. Seeing the same people several times matters more than the activity itself.
I went once and nobody talked to me. Should I give up?
One visit is not enough to judge. Try two or three more, speak first to people standing alone, and consider a more structured format.
How do I leave if I'm uncomfortable?
Decide a time in advance and say a simple line such as "I have to head off, nice to meet you." You do not owe an explanation.
Are online events worth trying?
They can lower the barrier for people who feel anxious, but in-person repeat events usually build closer bonds. See how to make friends online.
How do I turn a new acquaintance into a friend?
Suggest a small, specific plan, such as a coffee after the next session. Acquaintance to friend goes through the steps.
Solo Era for iPhone
Try it with Solo Era
Solo Era gives you one realistic mission a week, records how nervous you felt before and after, and keeps a photo journal of what you did. An iPhone app. A subscription is required to start missions; any free trial depends on the offer and eligibility shown in the app.
